Hi,
It sounds like you are doing the right things, but your comments about having uploaded programs before, did they actually run in the chip ?
Perhaps you should try proving things by programming up a simple flashing led and making sure it works ok.
Most of that type of programmer do have some form of timing adjustments, however no idea how it works on that program, you may just have to try a few points above and a few below to find a value that works.
One thing not mentioned is the length of the cable from the pc to the pic programmer, the shorter the better, if you are using a long 1.5 or 2 meter cable try an find something shorter as the signals can be affeced in such long cables.
You do not mention what your hardware is, I assume a dev board with either a serial or parallel programmer ?
Have not used that software which seems like its a limited free trial version of a purchaseable product.
Perhaps try one of these fully free software programmers, WinPic and PicAll, both of which I have used, found WinPic better.
Also look at WinPicProg and PonyProg