You can use a very basic circuit to phase-control loads like a water heater (see drawing below), but because you will be switching ≈5kW you may like to consider a solid state device.
For example: at 25% heater demand, this may mean 0.05 seconds on, 0.15 seconds off, 0.05 on, .... This is actually 3 sinewaves on, 9 sinewaves off, 3 on, 9 off, .... Since you are switching full sinewaves, starting at the zero crossing mark and ending at the zero crossing mark, there is no noise generated and the power is permitted to start at zero and then ramp up.
Here is an example of a solid state circuit based on a triac:
**broken link removed**
Regards,
IanP